Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Mr. President, Why do you Hate Memaw and Pa?

Dear Mr. President,

This is Kayne.  I'm only three but I am smart.  I just wanted you to know I sense it when my mommy, daddy, Nana, GG, Memaw and Pa are a bit stressed over taxes and the cost of things.  They want the best for me.  And all of them love me very much.  But I can tell when things are tough.   For my sake they try their best to hide it.

You see, Mr. Obama, I don't understand why the government believes they can keep taking from my family and expect them to take care of me?  Isn't it called stealing when you take things that are not yours?  Even excessive taxes (big words I know for a little kid)?

I do plan on going to college one day but your rules are just too hard.  The more you take from the people who love me, the less they have to buy me good clothes, Toy Story shoes, CARS and Thomas the train toys.   Oh, the less they have to save for my college tuition.

Just why do you hate people with money?  They give my mommy, daddy, Nana, GG, Memaw and Pa jobs.  They mean well.  And they don't steal from them like the Government does.

And what about Santa??
And I believe in Santa.  But even Santa will have a hard time making ends meet if you keep on pushing higher taxes!

Mr. President, have you counted the number of elves Santa hires each year?  There are more elves than people who don't have healthcare.  He is in that group of "rich" people that you keep railing against.  He has to be rich to buy all those goods and services to make toys.  He has earned his money. You didn't.  Leave Santa alone!  Right now. I'm counting on him to come see me Christmas Eve.  And you are making it very, very  difficult! 

Even Rudolph, who has a bad back from all those years of carrying the toy bag all over the place, is sad.  He likes the cookies I leave out for him.  And he gets very excited when he parks on my roof.  He knows I'm getting something good.

So, what is wrong with you, Mr. President?  I bet you'll be the first in line at Macy's begging Santa to bring your kids presents.

And another thing,  I love McDonald's Chicken Nuggets.  Tell Ms. Obama to leave my fries alone.  I won't eat her apple slices because I don't like them.  I want to be able to eat what I like.  Memaw keeps saying that as long as I am eating, I am getting nutrients.

And I heard Memaw tell the girl at McDonald's the other day she wasn't going to abide by Michelle Obama's rules and to give her sugarbear some fries in his Happy Meal.  Mark one up for Memaw. 

And you can also come tell Mr. Jimmy Love down here in North Carolina to leave my chocolate milk alone.  Every night after bathtime, Memaw makes me the best chocolate milk.  And I drink it.  So if I am drinking milk, it doesn't matter what color it is - IT'S MILK!

Your Secretary of State says "It takes a village to raise a child."  No, Mr. President.  My mommy, daddy, Nana, GG, Memaw and Pa is all it takes.   They love me.  They have been there since day one loving me and taking care of my every need.  And I must admit this too - my every want.

The rest of the neighborhood could care less about me.  They are trying their best just to survive too.  So leave us alone.  Stop taking money from my family.  Stop telling me what I can and cannot eat.

And leave Santa alone!!



Nancy said...

Quite inventive, Sheila! :)

Randall Lee Yow said...

Dear Kayne,

Don't sweat it chief. President Obama is only talking about going back to the old tax rates in the 1990's. I know you were not around back then, but let me tell you we were doing a lot better back in those days. You see some silly people decided to go to war without a war tax. The first time we ever did that in American History. So now we have to buckle down and pay the high cost to keep America safe.

Also you are kind of young so I understand you not understanding economics. You see rich people do not make jobs. Demand for a service or good makes people want to provide it for the economic reward they get. Demand creates a supply, a supply does not make a demand.

I am not sure but I don't think Santa hires the Elves. Santa strikes me a being a little more aristocratic than that. I think it is more like Santa is like the Czar and the Elves or more like his Serfs. They kind of came with workshop and land.

I am glad you like chocolate milk. Did you know a great man named Teddy Roosevelt and a great man named Upton Sinclair worked to purify foods to make them safe to eat and drink. They use to put some really nasty stuff in milk and the government came in and stopped them. You will learn more about Teddy Roosevelt when you get into school.

Now speaking of school. If you go to public school like I did, that is paid for with tax dollars. Now I do not have children myself because I have very been married. However my tax money goes for your's and other children free education there sport. Now some would say that's unfair, but I say that's part of being in a community. E Pluribus Unum (that's Latin), out of many, one.

I hope you've enjoyed our talk. If I could ask you to do me one little favor though. I wrote a letter to the Herald and to save your Grandmother an unnecessary spike in her blood pressure if you could hide the paper for the next couple days that would be great. Thanks a lot kiddo, and remember don't trust anyone over thirty.

-Randall Lee Yow
The following was written in humor, and was not meant to offend:)

Memaw said...

I can't even write back I'm laughing so hard!


Kirk D. Smith said...

"I have very been married" . . . . GREAT LINE! Ouch, laughing so hard, it hurt my pulled back!

Randall Lee Yow said...

Darn Typos!
That should have read never been married. Just think about your Brown Bess Musket (I'm sure you own one) and I'm sure that will make your back feel better Mr Smith. If that doesn't work maybe I could drive you up to Massachusetts and get you some Romney-Care.

-Randall Lee Yow

Kayne said...

Mr. Randall,

I am up late tonight because MeMaw drank mt dew and she is way too wired! So we found the Sanford Herald had gotten back to updating their website iat a decent time and your letter was there!

I don't know what you were talking about earlier. MeMaw was just as calm as I have ever seen her. That must have been a fair letter. She didn't look disgusted or nothing.

However she told me the money would be well spent. Da board of education hasn't been too good. And they need to go to timeout. But since they are much bigger than me, they won't listen. Therefore I agree with MeMaw (after all I can't count on you to buy me a new Thomas train).

Do the audit with Evergreen. Once and for all let the citizens win on this one. All they want is to trust the process. And since some of them have accused my MeMaw of awful stuff and acted like spoiled two year olds, I want it.

Thank you.


Anonymous said...

Sounds like Sanford County has a bit of mess going on. I don't mean to take away from the importance of issues or people, but can't we all get along. Now the man who made that comment: is he still in trouble with the law!!!!!! There are people who you can run over, there are people who don't want to rock the boat, but there are people like my sis, Sheila Barber, who knows right from wrong, and has the guts to stand up to anyone about any issued. I can't stand a person who licks butt constantly, who folds at the first sign of controversy. Praise God for people like Sheila who believes in fighting for what is right and for the rights of others.

Please run for President and get that idot out of office. And I thought Carter was bad.

Randall Lee Yow said...

You know the rumor going around the mean streets of Carolina Trace is that the Republican Ticket for the BOC in 2012 is going to be Shelia Barber, Kirk Smith, and Cameron Sharpe. Would anybody like to confirm or deny anything right now???

-Randall Lee Yow

Sheila Barber said...

Nope. Why does it matter?

Randall Lee Yow said...

Mrs Barber,

I take that "Nope" to mean no you will not confirm or deny anything. I myself just like to know whose going to run. After all I like to make an informed and reasonable decision when I vote. I like to weigh a persons political philosophy against the issues while taking into account their common sense and personal background, and then I vote for the best Democrat running (well that is not completely true I have voted for a non-Democrat on certain occasions, in fact I did not even vote for Al Gore when he ran).

I myself have had to battle off many rumors of my seeking office. I get asked every time there is an open sit in city government if I am running for it. I find it is best just to come out and squelch the rumors and the people spreading them, but I understand if you have adopted the Sarah Palin plan of will she won't she.

So, Mrs Barber will not confirm nor deny, how about you Mr Smith? Yea, nay, or are your political backers telling you to remain silent at this time? Oh, and Mr Sharpe should feel free to chime in with his intentions too, am sure he reads this blog or someone who does can relate the information to him.

-Randall Lee Yow

Sheila Barber said...

Thanks Randall. I'm glad you respect my wish for not revealing anything right now. Filing isn't until February 2012. So there's time.

I could also ask who is generating interest by talking about me but I'm sure I wouldn't find that out. Understood!


Randall Lee Yow said...

I take back what I said about Mr Kirk Smith running for BOC. He is far to busy trading letters with Neil Rotter. By the way I thought the Herald had a limit on those?

-Randall Lee Yow

Sheila Barber said...

That's what the Herald told me just a couple of weeks ago.

I see the other frequent flyer, oh I mean writer, is in today's. By the way, how long did it take for recent letter to get published, Randall?


Randall Lee Yow said...

Mrs Barber,

It took about 4 days for the letter about the audit to appear, but I have had it take up to 10 days before. I think a lot depends on how many letters they have waiting to be published. Mr Smith and Mr Rotter must have hit the limit by now.

-Randall Lee Yow

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