Twas the night before Christmas, when
all through the House
Each member was stirring, playing
with pages and not with their spouse
Nancy’s stockings were hung In the
chamber with care
In hopes that St. Bama would fill
them with Obamacare.
The peasants were nestled, all snug
in their beds
While visions of free health care
danced in their heads;
And
mamma Nancy in her kerchief, and boy Harry in his cap,
Had just settled down for a long America
destroying legislative wrap.
When out on the White House lawn,
there arose such a clatter
Bama sprang from the bed to see what
was the matter.
Away to the window he flew like a
flash
Tore open the shutters and threw up
on Michelle’s sash!
The moon on the breast of the global
warming snow
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects
below,
When, what to Bama’s eyes should
appear,
But a sleigh full of rednecks, lipstick,
guns, and gear.
With a brown- haired driver, so
lively and quick,
He knew in a moment it wasn’t St.
Nick.
More rapid than eagles her coursers
they came,
And she whistled and shouted and
called them by name:
“Now, McCain, now Putin, now Teddy, now Osama,
On Chavez, on Jesse, on Sharpton, on
Boehner
To the top of the porch! To the top
of the wall!
Now fire away! Fire away! Don’t let
that deer fall!
As dry leaves that before the wild
hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle,
mount to the sky,
So up to the White House the coursers
they flew
With a sleigh full of ammo, and Sarah
Palin too!
And then, in a twinkling, Bama heard
on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each
little boot.
As Bama drew in his head, and was
turning around,
Down the chimney, she came with a
hound.
She was dressed all in fur, from her
head to her foot,
And her clothes were all bought with
hard earned loot.
A sack of surprises, she had flung on her back,
And she looked like a hockey mom
ready to attack.
Her eyes – how they twinkled! Her
dimples, how merry!
It was so cold in that room, her nose
looked like a cherry.
Her lips were all painted, in Avon
Ruby Red,
Bama was shaking so hard, he fell off
the bed.
She was pretty and pumped, kinda “rogue”, you might say,
And proudly displaying the shotgun she
received as a member of the NRA.
Bama scattered to hide, but it was
too late,
His nightmare was real, he WAS awake.
She went straight to her work,
unpacking her bag
Pulling out the documents, the Founding Fathers had tagged.
The
Constitution she held tightly in her hand
While shaking it violently at Bama for his anti-American stand.
She quoted word for word, even the
bills
And no where did she find, Healthcare
was a frill.
She told him the Declaration of
Independence gave Americans a choice,
And sooner or later, he would hear
all the voices.
Beware! She said, the sleeping giant
has awakened,
Thank you Bama, for the anti-stance
you have taken
You’ve made us realize, we are still a
great nation.
Now America isn’t lost, no matter
what you try
The spirit, the people, well, we
haven’t died.
She turned and filled his stocking
with classics from Coulter, O’Reilly, and Beck,
Gave him a subscription to The Limbaugh Letter, then said “oh what
the heck”,
I’ll throw in The Constitution, and of course, a copy of “Going Rogue”,
Read them, Bama, for they will
comfort your soul.
She packed up her bag quickly, and
said Goodbye,
While
Bama crouched in a corner, with tears in his eyes.
She shot off some rounds, twisted her nose,
Reapplied her lipstick and up the
chimney she rose.
Bama ran to the window, to watch the
sight.
And he heard her exclaim as she rode
into the night,
“Merry Christmas America,
the Beautiful, the proud, and the
free!”
Dang, McCain
You’ve had too much whiskey!”
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